Tarot Card of the Day - Ten of Swords

It's typical at this time of year when there's such an emphasis on family and relationships and being happy, that anything that doesn't fit that pretty picture shows up in sharp contrast.

The Ten of Swords is about things coming to a head. We can look at both edges of the sword this way:

1. When you enter into family gatherings, are you going in expecting to fight with a particular relative because you usually do? If that's the case, try to move into the situation with fresh eyes, looking for the good in this person instead of searching for something to react to. Practice relaxation and breathing exercises in their presence so that you can drop your defensive posture and find ways to enjoy being in their presence. Better yet, try to understand why they say things that push your button. What is it inside of you that reacts and why? What is it inside of them that causes them to act the way they do?

Rather than allow a situation to escalate, see if you can't cut it through with the sword of compassion and understanding and put a halt to the cycle of reaction.

2. The other side of the sword is the need to speak up where you have habitually stayed silent. In some cases, dropping a defensive stance doesn't cause the other person to shift their behaviour. There is never a need to withstand putdowns and abuse. If your habit is to stew silently while being mistreated, then this card is an indicator that you now need to speak up and take care of yourself or others who are being disrespected.

Only you in your own wisdom know whether you need to defuse a situation or defend yourself. Trust you'll know in the circumstances which side of the sword to use.

Tarot Card of the Day - The Queen of Pentacles

Got your eye on some special Christmas goodies? At this time of year, we get a thrill at the thought of what might lie under the tree to be opened on Christmas Day. Either that, or we're already getting our list together for the Boxing Day sales.

The Queen of Pentacles is all about the bling. She's focused on having and acquiring the good things in the material realm. There's nothing wrong with wanting to enjoy the riches that the earth has for us. In fact, it's part of our experience as humans in the physical realm to experience sensual pleasure. However, we must balance satisfaction of our desires with the needs of others and of our planet.

Take time to find simple ways to thrill your sensual self, whether that is in taking time with your loved ones, going for a walk in the woods, or enjoying a good meal. Take what you will to enjoy yourself, but be sure to give back too. The queen cards also represent the maternal, so remember to take care of the ultimate mother - Earth - and find ways to give back to her at the same time that you enjoy her treasures.

Tarot Card of the Day - The Hanged Man

The computer screws up and dumps the entire document you had almost finished creating but hadn't saved. Your car won't start. The job you wanted doesn't pan out. All around you, doors are closing, and there is no open window in sight.

It's at these times that we are the hanged man, feeling restricted - perhaps even cheated - by life. Nothing we turn our hand to comes to fruition.

If you're living in the realm of the hanged man at the moment, the counsel here is for patience. It's not that nothing is happening. It's just that it hasn't manifested in the external world yet. Take this time of inactivity in the outer world to go inward. Often, when the doors close around us, it's a prompting from the universe to do the work within.

Once the shift occurs there, the external world must and will change to reflect that. For now, however, patience and inner practice are demanded of you by your higher self that knows better than you the road that lies ahead.

The Necessity of Cocooning

Do you ever have that feeling that the universe wants you to take some time off from focusing on the external world? Either there is less pull from the outside world for you to participate or you feel a drawing inward, a need to turn your attention to that still, small voice within.

Like a fall leaf curling in on itself, I find myself cocooning more in the winter months - and the outside world seems to reflect that intent. Falling snow silences the noises of the busy street. Darkness comes earlier each day, inviting me to cease my daytime activities and grow introspective.

I prefer to finish my Christmas preparations early in December, because the latter half of the month always requires of me a stock-taking for the coming year. I want to give myself that time to take care of any loose ends in the office, clearing away old paperwork to make for a fresh start in January. More importantly though, I want to sit quietly, with the snow muffling the world outside, with the dogs sleeping at my feet, with the darkness prodding me inward to listen to the voice I've been too busy to heed. It reminds me of who I am and my purpose on the planet. It gives me my footing so I know come January what my next step should be.

In the new year, I will venture outward again, each day growing brighter with the increasing daylight, my sense of purpose and the energy to activate it gaining with the change of season. Gradually, I will shuck my cocoon, more sure of myself and my goals, moving with the promise of fulfillment that always comes with the spring.

Growing Up: The Final Stage

When we're young, it's part of our growing up process to adapt our behaviour to the expectations of our parents and other authority figures. Rebelling, we discover, makes our lives more difficult, so many of us begin to govern our behaviour in order to win the approval of the people with the power.

This adaptation becomes such an intrinsic part of our behaviour that it can carry over into our lives as adults. While to some degree, this adaptation is a good thing - ensuring that most of us adhere to laws and use cultural cues such as manners to get along with each other - it can also become a stumbling block to our own development.

The final stage in growing up is to truly become who you are meant to be, and that of necessity means basing that evolutionary process on your intuition and not others' opinions of how you should behave and what goals you should pursue.

This stage of development is extremely difficult for many of us who have family responsibilities and work obligations. Still, it behooves all of us to the best of our ability to listen to our intuition and recognize when we are needlessly limiting ourselves because of our concern about how others may react.

We've forgotten who we were as children, before we got overly concerned with the opinions of adults. We've forgotten to be silly. We've forgotten to take chances. We've forgotten to trust our initial feelings about things and people. We've forgotten to listen to our intuition.

Several times a day, try to catch yourself altering your behaviour based on how others will respond to your actions. Decide whether you really need to take their opinion or reaction seriously. If the choice you're making doesn't affect that person directly, ask yourself if you really need to take their viewpoint into account on this occasion.

It's unsettling when we strike out on our own, doing what feels right for us despite people who disagree with our choices or who want us to conform to a particular view they have of the kind of person we are. It's unsettling to stand apart from the herd and trust an inner voice that may ask you to be a maverick from time to time. Yet, in the end all you leave this life with is you - and the choices you made.

Creating Connection During the Holidays

It's early morning. The dogs are curled around my legs as I lie in bed, and James, our manx cat, has not yet woken from his favourite perch on my office chair to tell me that it's his breakfast time. I want to savour the quietude, but my brain is already abuzz with its list of tasks for the day. There always seems to be something to accomplish - and the holidays create a blender effect of escalating duties that fill the imagination, crowding out the tranquility of the present moment.

It's so easy at this time of year to get caught up in holiday preparation and lose our connection, not only with others, but with ourselves. It's often difficult to shut down that anxious voice in our heads with its list that seems to be longer than the one Santa reserves for good children. Rather than try to shut it down, I suggest you take that extra few minutes in the morning to feel that tension to which the mind gives voice. Experience the fire in the body that stress creates. It's interesting to see how that anxiety shifts and slows when we give it attention rather than fight it off.

Take time, this season, to stop a moment in your bustling about and acknowledge your feelings. Don't worry about labeling them or figuring out where they came from. Just stop to feel - the same way we're often told to give pause for breath in yoga class. Just feel for a moment and allow your body and its emotions to come to rest. You'll continue into your day with a different perspective by being patient with yourself and your feelings each morning and whenever you can during the day.

Meet me online. These videos show the way I work during an intuitive consultation.

A Tarot Reading with Bonita

A Tarot Reading with Bonita – Work/Venture Spread

A Tarot Reading with Bonita - Relationship Spread

A Tarot Reading with Bonita – Spiritual Path Spread

A Tarot Reading with Bonita – Tools and Techniques

I created these videos to demystify the processes I use during an intuitive consultation. Consider them my personal invitation to meet me by phone, Skype, or in person.