Mask Work - Swimming in the Subconscious

I'm standing before Jacob James, actor and director with the Stratford Theatre, who is graciously taking time from his busy schedule to teach a series of acting classes at the Wellington Street Theatre in Kingston.

I'm new to acting, but not to energy work or tapping into the subconscious, so this feels like familiar ground. With a few preliminary instructions on the sacred art of mask work, he has me don a white mask and slip into a scenario that takes me on a journey into my own mind.

Placing the mask over my face, I close my eyes, and lie down on the floor. Breathing into the mask, I awaken and find myself on the shore of a vast ocean. Walking into the water, I find myself going deeper, ever deeper, and yet able to breathe in the water. I've been instructed to find a gift and see an animal and then fall back to sleep.

As I descend lower, I can feel my limbs become lighter, bobbing with the current. Soon, I notice a Venus flytrap (no matter that they do not exist at the bottom of the ocean - this is my dream). Prying open one of the pods, I find a pearl. I hold it in my hand and relish its glow as it catches the light from above the waves.

Suddenly, a large snake appears. I stroke its head and body as it coils around my waist, drawing me down to the sandy ocean floor where I fall asleep.

It's quite astonishing when we completely let go what we experience of our own mind, whether in an acting scenario, meditation, a Holotropic breathwork or other practice designed to open us to our inner terrain. When we really allow, all kinds of interesting imagery will arise. Why a snake, a Venus flytrap, a pearl? That is for me to ponder at my leisure.

Even more interesting to me is how the brain can generate the environment and objects in the scenario with mere prompting and my willingness to access the subconscious without editing its input.

As I continue to read "The Brain that Changes Itself", I'm astonished at learning how much of our perception is based on the way our brain works - and the choices we make in terms of perception. In his book, Norman Doidge MD writes about an experiment conducted by V.S. Ramachandran, who works to help amputees resolve "phantom pain", which is pain felt in limbs despite the fact that they are no longer there.

In this experiment, Ramachandran asked volunteers to put their right hand under a table while he simultaneously stroked and tapped the hand and the tabletop. This activity caused their brains to associate the tabletop as part of the body (to learn more about brain maps and how they do this, read the book). Then, he smashed the tabletop with a hammer and watched the stress levels of the volunteers skyrocket (measured by instruments to which they were attached). He discovered that the brain determines whether people register pain, and that altering participants' sense of reality (by getting them to associate the tabletop with the body) can influence their experience.

I find this particularly interesting given that I used meditation and self-hypnosis during my last two labours to circumvent the pain process. I suspect few doctors have seen women calmly sitting in a lotus position in hard labour indicating, "I'm ready to push now." The staff were so surprised, they actually placed me on a gurney in that sitting position and wheeled me to the operatory for the birth of my third child. With my ability to bypass the pain process, my husband and I were able to conduct the fourth birth at home by ourselves.

The brain's capacity to create our experience and our ability to consciously determine that experience continues to amaze me. Though we cannot control the external world, we can determine how we will respond to it, and thus influence whether we benefit or suffer as a result.

In the Crumbling Tower

It's been an astounding past few months after reading the Eckhart Tolle book, "A New Earth". Contrary to Oprah Winfrey's ecstatic, carefully screened guests, I've not "awakened" and found a beautiful, new world. Instead, my taste of enlightenment has left me in a wasteland of disintegrating ego, otherwise known as The Tower to those of you familiar with the tarot.

During one's time in The Tower, all that one holds dear loses its value, since it is fueled by egoic attachment. Much of what mattered becomes meaningless, and one loses the energy needed to push forward into the external world. Suddenly, a cave and a simple robe seem to be all that's worth shooting for.

However, far from being a wretched experience, The Tower can be very liberating. If you can be patient during your time there, if you can let go and allow the experience to take you over, if you can accept the destruction of the "you" that you thought you were, something beautiful will rise out of the ashes.

No teacher can give you clear directions along the path, since the one you carve is your own, but a good teacher will give you some pointers to keep you from getting completely lost. Adyashanti's "The End of Your World" picks up where Tolle's book ends. It answers the question: what happens after enlightenment? This is useful for all seekers who have had a taste of enlightenment, just enough to start the disintegration of the ego, but have not completed the process (which often takes many years - even lifetimes). Knowing that the apathy and discombobulation are a normal part of the experience is reassuring. It's useful, as long as one doesn't use it to prop up the tottering ego, but as encouragement to go deeper.